How can one overcome fear and rethinking
Fear of Success: How to Beat Them
Do you know that? You are on the verge of success, and at the crucial moment you do something that undermines the success. You prepare well for an exam and cancel shortly beforehand. Would you like to do your master's thesis with Prof. XY, who is considered ›difficult‹, but don't trust yourself to do it? Do you actually want to study abroad, but find numerous reasons why it doesn't work, or something similar?
The pursuit of success
Success is something that most people strive for day in and day out, whether in academic, professional or personal life. People dream of recognition, friendship, wealth and much more, and make efforts towards success.
Many of us are afraid of failure. Impending failure can paralyze and keep us from trying to be successful. In the USA, entrepreneurs are only considered credible and successful if they have failed at least once. In our latitudes, however, failure is a big issue, especially since those affected and their environment often associate it with a complete failure of the person (!). But not only the fear of failure, but also the fear of success blocks us: Success means change at the same time, and this can be frightening.
- What if i succeed? Do i want this?
- Will my friends still like me if I'm the only academic in their group?
- Will my fellow students appreciate me less if I take the exam alone?
- Will I be able to meet the higher expectations that success places on me?
Many questions go through your head, and the fear of change (metathesiophobia) can have a paralyzing effect on those affected. There are also numerous other unconscious fears. Failure or non-success also usually conceals a 'hidden gain': Those who study more slowly can lead a comfortable student life for longer. Those who fail an exam are often regretted and are the focus of caring for their loved ones. Thus, it can be the real or expected side effects of success that consciously or unconsciously lead a person not to have the success they would like to have.
Success comes from within
Of course, environmental factors influence a person's chances of success. A supportive environment (peer group), financial resources, personal investments - all of these can help or slow you down. However, anyone who observes successful people realizes that the decisive factor in whether someone succeeds or not lies in the person concerned. Successful people choose such paths to the goal that it can also be achieved. Success begins with a clear goal and is characterized by perseverance in trying to achieve it. Overcoming Fears of Success As a first step, it is advisable to explore the reasons for your own fear of success. Only those who know their worries and concerns can work on eliminating them. Fears can be diminished and transformed.
Self-coaching - your way to more success in your studies
Actively deal with your success by writing down a goal and working constantly to achieve it. Recognize and face your fears of success.
Experience teaches: From time to time each of us is accompanied by fear or doubt. The difference between more successful and less successful people is how they deal with fear!
- Take a close look at your fear: ›worst case‹ versus ›best case‹!
- Face your fear, that means ask yourself: What exactly am I afraid of? What's the worst that can happen to (me)? Then what is it?
- Then ask yourself: What if the best I can think of happens instead? So what?
Fears are made stronger by imagination
As a reminder: Fears often get their strength from a blooming imagination. These are ideas about what could happen. But what happens when suddenly a miracle happens instead and everything turns out fine? Is that now dreaming? Or are there exceptions? And have you even experienced that before? To put it provocatively: why not? Why not you too? And: why not now? Assuming that fears also have a purpose, a meaning, we could take a closer look and ask ourselves: What are fears useful for? What is this fear trying to tell us? What does she want to draw our attention to? What does our conscious attention need right now? When we are afraid, our attention is wholly focused on a situation, on a goal! Sometimes we then experience that, for example, we tackle tasks that we are afraid of more attentively and extremely carefully, more cautiously and with greater concentration than usual. Seen in this way, fear is a helpful companion at times, but it is not always.
Problems or fears show us the way!
In short: problems or fears show us the way! They can show us what is valuable or important for us in life.
The German psychologist, psychotherapist, and author Jürgen Hargens once put it beautifully: “The way it is, it's good. What else would it be good for? ”This approach can help relieve the pressure and doggedness. The consequence is known:
“That is exactly what it is, life when it is beautiful and happy: a game! Of course you can make anything else out of him, a duty or a war or a prison, but that doesn't make it prettier. ”Hermann Hesse (German-speaking writer, poet and painter, 1877-1962), from: Die Morgenlandfahrt.
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